Lost in Transition

I think I am living up to my name right now...Misty..abounding in or clouded by mist; appearing as if seen through mist; indistinct or blurred in form or outline; obscure; vague.

Since I have been back in the US, it has been quite an adjustment. I have been back since June and have been diligently looking for a job since July. It is now OCTOBER, and I still don't have a permanent/full-time job. This has been very difficult to learn through. God has been gracious and faithful of course through it all to remind me that He is near and in control...I still struggle almost daily at some point during the day, but I know He is near.

Needless to say though, my perspective and view on all of this has been "misty." I have been (and still struggle for being) so focused on my circumstances and what I think I am "lacking"; that I know I have been losing sight of Who is in control and the One who knows my needs better than I do. So with that in mind here are two songs and a psalm that describe the cry of my heart right now:

PSALM 13 (NIV)

1 How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?
How long will You hide your face from me?
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and every day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

4 my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in Your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in Your salvation.

6 I will sing to the LORD,
for He has been good to me.


The first song is called "More Than Anything" by Justin McRoberts:

Father forgive me for thinking only of myself
Make mine a heart that clings to You
Father unbind me from every secret sin I hold
Make mine a heart that says to You

Lord I want to be Yours
More than anything
More than anything in this world
I want to live in love with You.


The next song is called "I Will Lift My Eyes" by Bebo Norman:

God, my God, I cry out
Your beloved needs You now
God, be near, calm my fear
And take my doubt

Your kindness is what pulls me up
Your love is all that draws me in

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
Of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
Of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
Of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You

God, my God, let Mercy sing
Her melody over me
God, right here all I bring
Is all of me

Your kindness is what pulls me up
Your love is all that draws me in

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
Of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
Of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
Of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You

Cause You are and You were and You will be forever
The Lover I need to save me
Cause You fashioned the earth and You hold it together, God
So hold me now

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
Of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
Of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
Of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You


Wherever you are in Your relationship with the Lord or if you don't even have one, my prayer is that you would either hold fast to Him or begin a relationship with Him...because during times of uncertainty and fear it is so good to know that there is One much bigger, completely aware of and able to meet all yours and my needs (Phil.4:19), and totally in control. So there it is...may the Lord have His way with us. May we be still and know that He is God (Psalm 46:10). May we learn to walk by faith and not by our limited sight (Rom.1:17; 2 Cor.5:7; Gal.2:20; Gal.3:11; Heb.10:38). May His perfect love cast out all fear in us and may we truly take Him at His word, for He has NEVER and will never fail to fulfill and carry out His purposes (Psalm 138:8; Josh.23:14; Jer. 29:11).

In the words of Beth Moore, "I found Him faithful yesterday. He will not be unfaithful today."

Lord, I pray that You would lift our eyes off of ourselves and onto You for You are the Lifter of our heads (Psalm 3).